POPCORN

By Jim Szantor

Rhetorical questions, questionable rhetoric and whimsical observations 

about the absurdities of contemporary life

• Artificial Intelligence (AI) is all well and good, but I say . . .  let's leave Real Stupidity (RS?) well enough alone.
• jimjustsaying's take on the Electoral College:  There's no tuition, but the cost to the country can be devastating.
• Did Hillary Clinton really "win the popular vote"?  Or was she just the default recipient of the votes of people who really didn't like her all that much but will always vote Democratic no matter what?   So no one really "won" the popular vote, Donald Trump lost it.  (And there are those who think he has really lost it!)
• I hate it when I come up with what I think is a brilliant idea only to find (or be told) that it's already been done/said/debunked, whatever.  So I thought of a good name for a girl: Pristine.  (I'll hate it when somebody tells me they know someone who already has that name!)
• Speaking of which, here are some words of wisdom from computer programmer Grace Hopper: "If it’s a good idea, go ahead and do it. It’s much easier to apologize than it is to get permission."
• Butt-dialing is something that happens accidentally.  Fortunately, no known instances of butt-answering!
• "The trouble with telling a good story is that it invariably reminds the other fellow of a dull one."--Sid Caesar
• I'm getting to the age when discovering a pimple is almost a joyous occasion--an occasion that deludes me into thinking my youth hasn't totally abandoned me yet.  ("Bring on the acne, Lord--I can handle it now!")
• Why do companies keep sending me updates to their "privacy policies"?  Isn't that an invasion of privacy?  (If you're the type of person who has the time or makes the time to read privacy policies, you're probably the type of person who wouldn't mind having your privacy invaded!)
• jimjustsaying's Party Ice-Breaker of the Week:  "Say [actual partygoer's name here], did you know that the factory that makes York Peppermint Patties moved from York, Pa., to Mexico  in 2009, taking 300 jobs with it?"
• Get ready--you're going to be hearing a lot this month about March Madness (as if the rest of the year is totally sane).
• Madness musing:  Isn't the NCAA tournament played largely by a bunch of juniors and seniors who weren't good enough to get megabucks offers and jump to the pros?
•  "Maybe this world is another planet’s hell."--Aldous Huxley
• About that near-universal "Momily" to "always wear clean underwear . . . because you never know when you’ll be in an accident.”  
• Chances are if you're  in an accident bad enough to be taken to the hospital, nobody's going to be taking note of your underwear. And when’s the last time you read a story about an auto accident that said:
• "The injured driver comma who arrived at the emergency room in ragged underwear comma and without a clean handkerchief comma . . . . "  
• Newspaper Obituary Headline of the Month:  Nu Nu.  As in Marcell David "Nu Nu” Brice , Kenosha (Wis.) News obituary, Feb. 12, 2017.  R.I.P., Mr. Brice.
•  jimjustsaying's Word That Doesn't Exist But Should of the Month:  "Obstinut:  The pistachio that is impossible to open."  (Thanks to "gap@gmail.com.")
•  "Last week I helped my friend stay put.  It’s a lot easier than helping someone move."--Mitch Hedberg
• Good news and bad news department:  My blog got a huge plug from a prominent newsmaker the other day.  The bad news?  It was from Kim Jong-un.  (That's what I get for Friending him on Facebook.)
• Today's Latin Lesson:  Hoc quoquo transibit.  ("This, too, shall pass.")